a novel

having graduated from college is really confusing for me. up until now i have had a purpose, clearly defined, achievable, and sometimes all consuming. I was a student, and i was more than fairly good at it. but that identity has changed. i am now a graduate. and i am searching for a purpose the whole world is open to me now. it should be exciting, but somedays, especially today, it's terrifying. i could do anything, be any body, and chose any destiny. and i could lose myself completely in the attempt to find my true self.  the day after graduation i gathered for brunch with some friends. we chose to honor the four years spent together and recognize the gifts, accomplishments and talents in each other than might have gone unrecognized at the official ceremonies over the weekend. we called the recognitions "awards that matter." at the event I received a certificate of excellence in 'persistently seeking her true self' - a testament to my attempts to li...

Almost four weeks ago I left the Shenandoah Valley, Virginia to begin the next phase of my life. As many of you might know already, b eginning in August, I am planning to enter the Mennonite Voluntary Service program. MVS is an experience designed for young adults to grow in their faith, develop a deeper appreciation for the church, learn how to see what God is doing in the world, and imagine ways to become a  part of God’s kingdom work.   Through MVS, I will be spending the next year in a Rochester, New York. There I will have the chance to live in a mall intentional community of other MVSers and be a part of the faith community at Rochester Area Mennonite Fellowship. As my service placement, I will be volunteering full time with the Judicial Process Commission, a small NGO that supports ex-offenders in the reintegration process. I am looking forward to serving and building relationships that are transforming in my life. However,  I very much need you t...

Don’t go through life, grow through life– Eric Butterworth A tree blossoms with rain – Tanzanian proverb The time for transition has come again to my life. As of April 28, 2013 I will be concluding my four years of undergraduate study at Eastern Mennonite University, Harrisonburg VA. I have grown much during these years. The EMU soil is rich with inspiration and has nurtured my passions for community, for justice, for building peace.   I have honed useful skills, such as research, writing, analysis, etc.   I have questioned often, and perhaps learned to live into the questioning. I have eaten from dumpsters, participated in protests, and critiqued systems of injustice. I have been humbled by interactions across cultures, languages, faiths, denominations, and theologies. I have seen God reflected in many people and many places. I have cried much and laughed more. I have loved lots. I have been watered by wonderful people and I have grown. And now i...

On Sunday evening I was blessed by the opportunity to spend an evening with 3 wonderful woman, to tell stories, to share our lives, and to laugh together until we cried. The reunion of the "Pit of Awesomeness" (my wonderful apartment from junior year) was as epic as could ever be desired. As we drank tea, ate chocolate from Austria, and shared dumpster doven delicacies, we reminisced on the beauty and the pain of life. We had not been together in the same place since April, and yet we fit back together like pieces of the puzzles we worked on diligently each Sabbath on our apartment floor last year. Perhaps it is always so with the best of friends. At one point we talked and laughed and thought and pondered, our topic of conversation drifted to the topic of world events. We discussed stories of pain, of death, or trauma in our world. And as we sat reminiscing on all the violence, that instead of dwelling on the horror in th...

It is a New Year. The calender slips quietly into 2013. January begins again. And I return to the mountain valley that has shaped and molded and challenged and inspired me for one last semester at EMU.  I wonder what this new year will bring, and what challenges, tears, and joys will come in this last new semester of my undergrad degree. I wonder how I will make the most of my time - or better yet, how I will be in the time I have there - and how I will treasure and honor the relationships and friends there who have held and molded pieces of my soul over the past 3 and a half-years. I'm curious how I will apply the lessons and learnings from my months in DC, from my service with Action for Peace Through Prayer and Aid and my work with Shoulder-to-Shoulder, from my experience living with 12 wonderful women and a single man in Brookland, to my life back at EMU. I'm wondering how time spent with family in Europe, in Winnipeg, and in Abbostford has raised q...

every few months, my 'life' goes back into boxes. i wrap my camels and picture frames in scarves and collect my artwork off the walls. i hold each object and piece of cloth lovingly before i put it away. i try to keep only things with sentimental value - pieces of matter that speak to me of people, places, or experiences that have shaped me. other things get donated or recycled. every time i wonder at all i have collected, of all this substance that speaks of who i am. this time round i have nice plastic boxes that will hold these material reflections of my life. the vibrant colors, especially the chadian fabric, are visible through the clear plastic of the closed boxes - a foggy window into the partial reflection of my passions and my life journey. possessions do not define us and i recognize that i am so much more than the sum of what i own or wear. however, what i own and how i present myself has the capability to honor my individuality, my strength of character...

This semester I am studying in Washington, DC with the Washington Community Scholars Center out of Eastern Mennonite University.    We don’t just live in DC, or just work in DC, we study being there. Part of the purpose of the WCSC program is to combine the lens of learning with that of urban living and service. We are encouraged to look around at the city and our experience with a critical, curious eye – to ask questions and to delve into the complexity of their non-answers.  For one of our classes we are encouraged to explore the dynamic of faith in an urban setting. Each of us chose a local faith community to visit with and research. The goal was to see how their world view interacts with the community in which they live.   And so a few Sundays this semester I found myself gathering in silence at a Quaker meeting across town. Always inspired by the way in which the Religious Society of Friends, also known as the Quakers, are politically and sociall...